I can already hear "But what if . . .!" over and over again as I re-read the previous blogs. "But what if the mother can't breastfeed?" "But what if the baby can't breastfeed?"
"But what ifs" are a reality. We, as believers, know that, although this Earth was created in perfection, man's sin in the Garden of Eden resulted in God placing a curse on the world He so joyfully created. Until that curse is removed after Christ returns to rule forever, the "but what ifs" will be here.
It is true that there are occasionally some metabolic, endocrine, neurological, anatomical, and even surgical (elective or not) issues in mother or baby which interfere with the establishment of breast milk, the delivery of the milk from the breasts, or the baby's ability to extract or safely ingest the milk. But, these situations are rare. Most women who have difficulty establishing a milk supply and most babies who have difficulty extracting milk do so because the first days of breastfeeding were not "normal". By "normal", I mean, interventions and actions occurred which disrupted the natural design for the establishment of breastfeeding. These include:
- there was limited skin to skin contact between baby and mother
- there was a delay in placing the baby to the breast
- there were delayed responses to the baby's feeding cues, resulting in fewer than optimal effective feeding sessions.
- supplemental feedings were given, often with the use of artificial nipples, and/or pacifiers were used so the feeding cues of the infant were diminished.
- there was less than required stimulation of the breasts, either by the baby, hand expression, or proper breast pump, or combination of all three.
(I promise I will cover these issues in later blogs!)
These "interferences" with breastfeeding success could be associated with lack of knowledge, lack of support, other medical influences (drugs the mom was given in labor, C-section delivery, ill baby, etc.), pressure from family members to "feed the baby", mother's discomfort to try to feed with many family members around, and so on. If these interferences were eliminated, almost all, if not all women whose circumstances are limited to these categories would be able to breastfeed successfully.
Yet, there are times when women who desperately desire to breastfeed are unable to do so. Endocrine issues, like PCOS (sometimes), or anatomical issues like insufficient breast tissue (not to be confused with breast size), neurological issues like radiation to the brain which damaged the pituitary gland or severe blood loss during delivery which also damaged the pituitary gland, a baby who can not maintain a latch for a variety of reasons (some fixable, some not), and others do result in lactation failure. Some can be overcome with the help of a lactation professional, but some can not. (In some cases, the baby can take nourishment at the breast even though most if not all of the milk is provided via a flask and tube which delivers the milk while the baby is nursing.)
When there is nothing which can be done to salvage breastfeeding, we must remember that it is God who is in control of our lives. We can still accept His will in a way which gives Him glory. With all the great benefits that breastfeeding, especially when it is delivered at the breast over the early years of a child's life, provides over the life span, it is God who created each child. He is able to make up any gaps in health and development as He sees fit. We are not guaranteed everything will be perfect -- even if we breastfeed each child for several years! We are promised God will take care of us, will walk with us through disappointments and through difficult times, and that we can trust His will because He loved us to much, he willingly sent His own Son to die for those who did not love Him. "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you." (Isaiah 49:15)
There is another point that needs to be made. While I am writing all of these blogs/chapters to show how incredible breastfeeding is, I strongly believe the decision to or not to breastfeed rests with the mother. Only she knows what is going on in her life at the time. She may have quite a grid to filter this decision through -- a grid we know nothing about.
I often use this example when I talk with lactation consultants or nurses, "A woman in labor has two children, both breastfed for at least a year. Her husband left her when she was 5 months pregnant and has disappeared off the scene. She is now living with her parents, and will be returning to school in 4 weeks. She has a part time job. After examining everything she decides that in order to help feed her children and finish school so she can support her family, she can not breastfeed this baby, even though she is aware of the risks involved with formula feeding. This is her choice to make. But, what if this same woman, in the same circumstances, had some additional support from her employer, her teachers, her friends, and so on, and she knew she could manage pumping when she was separated from the baby, so she decides to breastfeed. This is still her choice to make. WE don't know everything there is to know about her circumstances. We must respect her decision."
All we can do as family, friends, or health care professionals is to provide information and support to help each woman make her decision, help her reach her goal, or to help her deal with disappointments.
Still, dear friend, if you find yourself in a situation where breastfeeding may be difficult, try. If a health issue is threatening your success, work closely with a certified lactation consultant and your baby's physician. If life in general makes it seem impossible, trust God to help you. You may be very surprised that, according to His will, you find something which works to help you continue. Even a few days or weeks of breastfeeding has tremendous health benefits for your little one. You may find that the time it takes to breastfeed or pump is recovered by having to spend less time taking care of a sick baby, or at the pharmacy in the middle of the night, in the ER when you are supposed to be at work, etc. Fewer missed days of work because your baby stays healthier can help stretch the budget. Decreased health care costs along with the cost of formula can also help maximize limited resources. Later, you may be able to not have to spend hours upon hours helping your older child with homework -- those "extra" I.Q. points can really help with school work!
I have learned over the years that we, as women, learn a lot about ourselves when we give birth and when we care for babies. We learn from our successes (we want to repeat them in with future children) and from our bad experiences (we want to change what we did before in order to avoid them!). It would be wonderful if breastfeeding went smoothly for every woman, and with every baby. But, "what ifs" are real, so there are no guarantees.
If a "what if" enters your breastfeeding world, try to get rid of it by seeking correct information and support. If it stays so long that the "what if" becomes a "what is", and breastfeeding can not work because of a God-ordained complication or situation, "in all things give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus, concerning you" (I Thess. 5:18). You will likely grieve the loss of the experience. God understands and will comfort you. You will be tempted to worry about your baby's health. It is then that you must trust that God will work His special plan for you and your baby. Isaiah 40:11 tells us "He tends his flock like a shepherd; He gathers the lambs in his arms and he carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young."
Back in the 1940s, a woman was told by her physician uncle that her milk was lacking and that she needed to stop breastfeeding. Here was the situation: her chubby 3 months old was crying to nurse more often. She did not understand why. Her uncle, a family doctor, told her to express some milk into a glass. She described it as the color of "dirty dishwater" -- very thin and bluish. The physician's conclusion was that her milk could not meet her baby's needs -- despite the evidence of a robust, healthy three month old.
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| Foremilk on the left. Hindmilk (high fat) on right. |
Below is an ad (with recent comments) from Carnation.
The baby threw up a lot, and did not gain weight well. When the baby was six months of age, the mother decided to try goat's milk. This was tolerated better than the sugar-syrup and processed evaporated milk. The baby continued to have some health issues, from chronic bronchitis, to dark patches of skin on the back of her neck, her knees, and other places. Other differences showed up as she began to mature into womanhood. At age 20, she was diagnosed with an endocrine disorder, and would have been infertile without surgery. God provided a wise, Christian physician at a critical time to diagnose provide a surgical treatment. As a result, she was able to bear children. When she was 29 years old, she had a diagnosis of thyroid cancer. Upon doing research, she found some triggers, including having ingested goats milk in the late 1950s. Surgery and radiation treatment was successful, but did require that she wean the baby she was nursing sooner than she desired. However, that baby had breastfed for 20 months and grew up very healthy. He is now a Doctor of Pharmacy, with an interest in natural approaches in medical therapy.
So, what was the connection of goat's milk to her health as a young woman? Well, scientists were testing the atomic bomb in the southwestern part or the U.S. The winds were blowing the radioactive particles post explosion toward the northwest part of the U.S. where many goats were kept. Their milk was sent to other parts of the U.S., including the southern states, where this mother and baby lived. The baby likely had radiated goats milk for several months of her infancy. Ingesting radiated goats milk has been linked to thyroid cancer.
Now, back to the mother who gave birth to this baby girl. Had the doctor-uncle known fifteen years earlier what we know now -- that all that was going on with his niece's baby was a normal growth spurt and that the milk which the mother expressed was "foremilk", high in water and sugar, and low in fat, that mother would have continued breastfeeding, and would have breastfed her second and third child, most likely. (Foremilk is the first milk which lets down during a feeding. Hindmilk, rich in fat, lets down a few minutes into the feeding. This design allows babies to "get a drink of water" when they are thirsty, and gives them lots of calories when they are hungry and nurse longer!) All a mother has to do during baby's growth spurt is to nurse the baby more often for a few days. Her supply will increase, and the baby returns to his or her normal feeding pattern.
But what about the baby daughter who was given corn syrup and evaporated milk "formula"? Even though she deals with health issues connected to not being breastfed, she has found God faithful in caring for her. Using her understanding of her background, God developed in her an interest in helping childbearing and breastfeeding women. She became a childbirth educator, RN, and lactation consultant. Because of her experience as a baby and as a young adult, and because of what she learned from books in a little library in Dublin, Georgia, she became interested in helping women become informed about important decisions regarding their own and their babies' health care. She served her daughter in law as a doula for the birth of her first two grandchildren. She was able to support her daughter in law as the new mother began to breastfeed. She taught thousands of women in class and in the hospital, and is still teaching. She has been able to provide education to physicians and nurses so they can better assist breastfeeding women. She wrote articles on birth related issues for publication in both lay and professional journals. She presented information on other topics to women for Bible studies, women's group meetings, etc. Then, one day, she decided to write a blog on breastfeeding from a Christian perspective. . . and called it Sincere Milk. (Note: Blog name is now "Pure Milk".)
God IS in control. He uses the circumstances He ordains for GOOD. "We know that in ALL things God works for GOOD of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose". (Romans 8:28 NIV).
Efforts to identify owner of photograph have been unsuccessful. Photo will remain or be removed depending on owners directive, if owner is located.
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